The Things I Do For Quality Children's Entertainment
I love The Lorax. Humbly, I will assert that it is the best Dr. Seuss book to grace God's green earth. I mean, humming fish! Barbaloots! Total ruin of the environment at the hands of capitalist overlords! What's not to like?
Obviously, I jumped at the opportunity to see a live production of The Lorax at the Old Vic Theater in London this past week. So what if it was a children's production? I would show up, get some popcorn, and scrunch down in the seat to avoid blocking the children's view with my massive adult head. It would be a win-win. My friend Reid wanted to come with, so we bought advance tickets and waited for the glorious day that we would be able to cash them in.
Finally, the day came. We had planned on grabbing dinner beforehand, but Reid had an unexpected field trip, so we decided to skip dinner and meet at 6:30 instead., Eexactly onean hour before our show was set …show more content…
The train that pulled up was so filled with people that I thought it would slow to a halt halfway through the tunnel. We crammed in amongst the Londoners and tried not to suffocate.
I cannot tell if this subway trip can be classified as an out-of-body experience, solely because I was so acutely aware of the amount of human bodies next to mine. It was like a horrible, depressing orgy in which the entire city of London was forced to take part. Reid and I were accidentally groped by no less than fifteen people. The whole train ride was a series of mumbled apologies. It was unavoidable – hands were everywhere, and no one had space to spare. I was three inches from a stranger's face. I think I saw straight down a French man's throat and into his soul. We were that packed.
When we finally burst out of the subway, we had two minutes left to find the theater. I screeched in frustration. We checked the distance on Google Maps. A ten-minute