Four Tendencies Summary

For my application paper, I will focus on the topics of Rubin’s “Four Tendencies” and Irvine, The Stoics and Control. In the reading of Rubin’s framework, I learned that people usually fall within one of the four tendencies mentioned. Our inner and outer expectations play a huge role on our habits. The way we respond to our expectations classifies which tendency we fall under. “Our Tendency colors the way we see the world and therefore has enormous consequences for our habits” (Rubin, “The Four Tendencies,” 18). In the reading of The Dichotomy of Control, “The Stoics argue that rather than striving after many things that will only lead to frustration, a better goal is to want only those things that one can be confident that he or she can obtain” …show more content…
This is where he added “things over which we have some but not complete control” (Irvine, Handout). The main idea of the Trichotomy of Control is not to set easy goals but rather set rational internal goals in order to lessen our disappointment when it comes to unwanted outcomes.
In addition, the Four Tendencies reading had helped me become aware of the fact that I am an Obliger. It makes sense as to why it is hard for me to tell others no and why I have such difficulty keeping my internal goals. In result of knowing this about myself, I want to become stricter when it comes to making decisions about going out with my friends. Instead of always telling them yes, when they ask for favors, I will assess my current priorities. I have talked to my suite mates about the reading, and by giving them this information, they have become more understanding and supportive of the reasons why I have not been able to go out much. Instead of going out, we go to the library and study together. When we finish our work, we go to the Kat Klub to play pool or air hockey. There has not been a problem, but knowing myself, I made sure to include my sister in this process. She is an Upholder, so I know